tiller of the backyard garden
________________________
2.24.2005
  Neat Thought


Here's a neat paraphrase from a tape I was listening to today:

"We don't fight to get authority for Jesus, we fight for the one that has all authority" (in the context of "culture wars")

Guess who said it?
 

2.23.2005
  Natural Birth


Warning: this is semi-graphic

After delivering our first two babies in a local hospital (my wife did all the work), for reasons I won't explain right now, my wife and I decided to have our next baby at a delivery center with a midwife. You know, the whole natural birth, anti-doctor, anti-drug, anti-establishment, anti-anything-else-you-can-think-of crowd. Which is good, because we are a lot of that as well, although not all. Well, we have to go through childbirth classes, again, even though there's nothing new to us. So our instructor is this nice lady who happens to specialize in Hypno birthing, and is just the epitome of the natural birth scene. No problem. Well at the second class, my wife and I are there a little early with one other couple and this lady is rummaging around in the closet. At 7:00 she tells us that people who are late miss out on her special treats. My wife, since she is pregnant, seems to think she is referring to chocolate, I however, am a bit more skeptical.

She pulls out a blue plastic bag and sets it on the ground. Then she lays out all these cotton medical rags. Okay, what's going on? She's going on and on about how lucky we are and how we're going to be so excited. I thought this lady was going to burst herself, with how much excitement she had.

So finally she opens up the bag and out flops ---- a placenta. For those of you who have seen your wife's placenta and think its cool, good for you, but I had managed to make it through two deliveries without ever having to see the thing, and now here in front of me is some unknown lady's placenta. And this thing was fresh. She told us how a lady had delivered it there the same morning!

For the next half hour this lady is poking and examining this extremely bloody mound, and telling us all the bad things the mother ate, or where she was exposed to second hand smoke, or what kind of medicine she was taking. It was like sitting in on a spiritist or diviner's session. She was yanking away on the cord, and stretching the outer membranes. Anyways, when she pulled it out I was hoping that one of the pregnant women would lose it and throw up just to teach her a lesson for pulling that thing out without a warning. Needless to say, it was an interesting class.

So do any of you out there have any special placenta stories? Anyone keep it, or plant it with a tree? I hear some cultures even eat it, but I just can't stomach that.
 

  And Forgive Us Our Debts


First off, I memorized this as a child as "Forgive us our trespasses", but I'm not sure I've ever heard anyone say it like that in at least 5 years, so I'm not sure which translation it is. Consequently, my daughter has memorized it this way, and I think I'm going to have to teach here to say "debts" instead. I don't think either one really translates that well in today's vocabulary though. They both convey the right idea when you think about it, but the meaning that first jumps in my head is usually different.

postscript: I found this
The word 'trespasses' has come down to us from the very earliest English translations of the New Testament. As early as 1380 it was used in Wycliffe's translation of the Lord's prayer. It is more difficult for us to grasp the full meaning of what it means to 'trespass' against someone, because the word has changed its meaning since 1380. Nowadays we tend to use the word 'trespass' to mean walking over someone else's land without their permission. Originally, though, the word had a sense of infringing not only land, but the rights and dignity of another. To trespass against someone was to injure them or do them an injustice.


Here is the principle of daily confession of sins. When I was first a believer someone taught me that once we confessed our sins that first time, everything was square, and that was it. But Jesus teaches us just the opposite when he tells his disciples to ask for God's forgiveness whenever they pray. Confession is important not only so that we may be forgiven, but also to remember why we need to be forgiven. When Jesus says that he has come to heal the sick, not the well, we can sometimes think "Uh-oh, I'm not even really that sick, will Jesus still take me," and in that thought (or something similar) we reveal how truly sick we really are. It's so easy to trust in your own (non-existent) righteousness, and that is the very thing that we must repent of, and the very thing that He saves us from.

When I am praying this I tend to confess all the things I have done, and all the things that I am (a murderer, an adulterer, a liar, etc.) It is a time to ask the Lord to open you up, and to be honest before Him. All things must be brought out into the light and exposed for what they are. This is helpful for me, but maybe all that is needed, is all that Jesus said, "Forgive us our debts." I will just point out once again the corporate aspect of this petition "forgive us."
 

2.21.2005
  Give Us This Day Our Daily Bread


Okay, I'm going to step out on a limb here and say that this one really isn't hard for me, but just as I type it I realize why it isn't. I was going to say that I am pretty good at believing that the only reason I ever have anything to eat is because God has in some way provided it, but then again, I do not live a needy life. Our family is blessed way beyond measure, and it is very clear to us that we should not be living the life we are if it were not up to God. How we make it month to month still boggles my mind.

Anyways, this part of the phrase is straightforward and cuts to the chase. This in no new principle, its the same thing the Israelites had to learn in the wilderness: God is the one who provides for our needs. We are to petition the Lord in faith to take care of our needs. I think an important part of this section is the fact that we are to ask daily. The Israelites were only given enough food for one day (except for the Sabbath I think), and any extra that they took would be bad by the next day. God wants to rely on him at all times, which is interesting, because humans tend to have this problem with self reliance. I also need to remember that I am not asking for the Lord to give me my daily bread, but to give us our daily bread, once again signifying the corporate aspect of prayer. Very simply: we are to ask God to provide for all of our needs, and humbly rely on Him to provide them.
 

2.18.2005
  On Earth as it is in Heaven


Once again I find myself a little in over my head. This is a completion of the thought that we are asking for God's will to be done, and not our own. I guess I won't presume to expound on this phrase, but rather tell you what I'm thinking when I pray this. For me it's important to remember that God is reigning over the earth as well as over the heavenlies. I know there can be some division on this, but too bad, it's my blog. I meditate on what God's long term will is for this earth, and ask Him to help me yield to that will, and give up my own.

We were watching a Francis Shaeffer video series last night on suffering, and there was a great part where he and his wife Edith were discussing living and praying in the "heavenlies." We tend to think about what is going on around us in carnal or temporal terms, missing the "big picture." Francis talked about how we read the book of Job and understand that Job's suffering was a part of something bigger, but we forget that Job didn't know that. Job didn't have the first few chapters to give him an idea of what was really happening, he just knew he lost everything he had.

I'm not sure exactly how that ties in, but I know it does. There is a real connection between heaven and earth. God doesn't need us to ask Him to do His will on this earth, but when we do, we are forced to recognize and admit that it is really His will that is important (once again - not ours). There is a great connection with this passage and that of Our Lord Jesus in the garden praying before His betrayal (Mt 26:39,42,44).

I think in reality, I don't really grasp this yet, or at least faithfully believe it. The example I gave the other day about God being a genie really shows that. In my prayer times I am really praying for my will to be done on earth, with God's help. Think about it, do you really want God's will to be done on earth? What if it means your children are killed, or you get cancer, or something happens to your wife, or you lose your job, etc, etc? Are you ready for that? Am I? Was Job? Lord, give me faith to believe what is so painfully clear.

I tend to think, "Yeah God, your will be done on this earth, let's see some retribution on the evildoers, bring in a godly government," you know that kind of thing. I apply principles to everything but myself (this is nothing new to christians, I know). I guess I should spend more time meditating on whether or not my prayers are really seeking that the Lord's will be done and I am being a faithful servant, or if I am still seeking after my own desires and am treating the Lord with contempt.
 

  Regarding Stories of Ships


Has anyone read any Patrick O'Brian novels? He seems to be the master of the naval story so I thought I might try a couple of his books. Any suggestions on where to start?
 

2.17.2005
  Self Portrait


Here is a photo of myself, my wife, my dad, my mother and our kids dirty mirror.

 

2.16.2005
  Ships and Epics


There is a question at the end of this post for you to answer.

I just read half of "Voyage of the Dawn Treader" last night and was really into it. I have loved all of the Narnia books so far, but there is something about this book that really captures my imagination.

I guess I have an attraction to stories involving ships. Is it possible to have a story revolving around a ship that is not an epic? I guess the main reason naval stories are so creative and interesting is that they involve lots of different "lands" and "peoples" by necessity. The story isn't stuck in one setting, so the author has to create lots of different landscapes and characters. "The Odyssey" is still one of my favorite stories because of this. I guess of kind of a ship geek. I took this great class in college called "Seapower in Antiquity" or something of that nature that was so fascinating.

So, my question is, for all of you out there, what books can you suggest to me that revolve around seafaring or ships, or anything else of that nature?
 

2.15.2005
  Thy Will Be Done


Continuing my mini-series on prayer, I've now come to a somewhat difficult phrase (for me at least), "Thy will be done." It's such a "famous" and common phrase in Christianity, that it's easy to skip over it and not have to think about it. But unfortunately, for me, it is one of those phrases that if I actually make myself stop and meditate on it, I found my head spinning. What does that mean, Thy will be done? Well, I guess its pretty simple, not my will Lord, but yours. But do I really mean that, don't I really want Him to grant me my desires, and do my bidding?

Here's a simple example (a short tangent, but it just popped in my head), I was sitting a light for a long time yesterday and I prayed "please Lord let this light stay green", which it did, and I gave Him praise. Then I came to and told myself that God is not a Genie, He's not here to do my bidding, I'm here to do His! I don't necessarily think it's wrong to pray those sorts of prayers, but it made me think about how I view God. It's easy to be reverent in a quiet somber prayer time, but my perception of God is made real through my daily living.

Okay, so back to Thy will be done, we've got the first part, not my will, His will. So what exactly is the will of God? I've grown up (in my christian walk, not my life) pretty confused on this issue by terms like perfect will, and permissible will, and the like, so I must confess that things can get a little cloudy. In regards to the question, I ask myself another: "in what regards?" If I break the question "What is the will of God" down, the answers are a little more clear. I know what God's will is in my family, in my career, in my life, and even in the world, so it's really not so tough a question after all. I just need to meditate on the first part of "Thy will be done", which I have already discussed. It doesn't really even matter that I know what His will is, its just that I need to pray that His will is done, and not mine. He must increase, but I must decrease (Jn 3:30).

Now you know what I mean about my head starting to spin when I get thinking about this phrase. I know it's a bit of a ramble, but, it is what it is.
 

2.14.2005
  Defense


I will probably delete this entry after I cool down.

As I've said before I work for my father, who owns his own company. One of his employees, who has been sort of a friend of the family and is also a christian brother, quit today. He was making his rounds telling everyone, and stopped in the office across from mine, which is occupied by one of the VP's. Eventually he began bad mouthing my father, and so I started listening.

Now you have to realize that I grew up as a rebellious son who severely disrespected my father in many ways. The Lord has been seriously transforming me to the point that I know have an extreme (not really the best word) amount of respect for my father and am now very defensive of him. I've come close to punching one my siblings when they've disrepected him, but I thought that would only make him look worse.

So as this man was disrespecting my father, I felt my body temperature raise about 10 degrees and felt the sudden urge to go tackle this 250-pound man (I'm 5' 5", 155 lbs). I like this guy though, so I kept my composure and just said "you better go in another room if you're going to disrespect my father." He was a bit defensive and tried to explain his position and I just said "He's my father, and you know how sons can get about their fathers, so just don't talk about him." I've never felt so much passion about my father in my life. He afterward came and pseudo-apologized, and I had no angry feelings. Just wanted to get that out of my system as my blood pressure is still on its way down.
 

2.09.2005
  Thy Kingdom Come

I know there is so much in this prayer that I can't even begin to understand, much less explain, so keep in mind these are just my thoughts.

This is a really exciting part of the prayer for me. There is a joyful longing, an expectation of the Lord's kingdom coming in power. He doesn't need us to ask for this, he is already doing it; but he wants us to ask it, to be involved. We are the foot soldiers that are helping to usher in his kingdom. There is also a form of self-denial here. Not my kingdom Lord, but yours! It should be obvious, but sometimes we need to remember that we are not here to work out our own personal goals, we are here to glorify God and help build his kingdom. There such an intense longing for me when I pray this. In the context of our surrounding culture its easy to cry "Lord bring your Kingdom."

When Jesus was teaching this prayer to his disciples they must have had the same eager expectation, and yet they were probably expecting a different kind of kingdom. Once again we must remember "thy kingdom" come, not "the kingdom I want" to come.
 

2.08.2005
  Advertising





Let me take a minute here to advertise a few things:

My wife now has a website to sell personalized baby blankets, diaper bags, burp cloths and onesies at www.lilyputlane.com. Please stop by and support a small "local" business. The site is not completely done, but is fully functional.

As a part of lilyputlane.com I am also offering my bookbinding services. See here.

As you know, I have had the little iPod deal on my sidebar for some time now. I am still looking for 2 people to complete an offer so that I can finally get the 300 sermons that I have been downloading (in anticipation) off of my computer. That's all for now, thanks.

 

2.07.2005
  Hallowed be thy name
Mat 6:9 After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name.


"Hallowed by thy name"
When I say pray this phrase, I remind myself who I am praying to. The Lord is great and is to be feared. His name is Holy. Our family is going over the ten commandments, and we were very convicted by the fact that we so easily break the third commandment to not take the Lord's name in vain. We are accountable for every word that leaves our mouth. Meditating on this phrase helps me to humble myself and attempt to approach God with lowliness, sincerity and reverence. These are not things that come to me naturally, and my early brand of christianity lent itself more to a slap God on the back and say "hey God, how's it going?" kind a relationship. But I must learn, and teach, the reverence that is due to God and the fear that must accompany it.
 

2.04.2005
  The Lord's Prayer


I have never been "good" at prayer. I have a hard time focusing, as my mind is almost always racing and sitting quietly gives it even more of an excuse to do so. In teaching our daughter L the Lord's prayer, I have found it helpful of late to use the prayer as a guide for my own prayers. I meditate on each line of the prayer and use it to guide my own. I am going to write out my own thoughts for each line of the prayer on this here blog; a kind of exegesis of sorts, though not really.

Mat 6:9

"Our Father which art in Heaven"

The first word "Our" shows the corporate aspect of prayer. We approach God as His bride and His body. God saves individuals, but only as a part of his people. Modern Americans unashamedly have a problem with individualism, and this disease is not at all absent from the church . In a culture where everything is about the individual, including salvation, we would do well to remember that God has set apart a people for Himself, of which we are graciously a part. When we approach the throne of God in prayer we are approaching it as His bride, so we should remember to lift up our brothers and sisters that are besides us. And this doesn't only include the brothers and sisters in our local church, but rather the saints gathered around the world. Pretty exciting stuff. Remembering that prayer is essentially a corporate act, even when alone in your prayer closet, can be helpful in guarding yourself against morbid introspection or dwelling on selfish desires.

Related to this corporate aspect is the next word "Father." The familial aspect of the people of God and their relation to one another should be driven home by the fact that we all have a common father. Our brothers and sisters in Christ are exactly that because we are born of the same father (2 Cor 6:18). We may share almost nothing else in common, but our familial relationship is secured by our paternal line, so to speak. It's amazing to me to think that I am praying to the same Father that King David prayed to. Over 4,000 years ago, King David was looking to the sky and talking to the same Father that I am, and He has never changed. I am truly a brother to one of the most magnificent men in history. Take that even farther and meditate on the relationship to our elder brother Jesus and its almost too much to take (Mt 12:50).

Our Father is not an earthly father, for he dwells in Heaven. This honestly kind of blows my mind, still. I think about our prayers rising up like incense to our Lord who is enthroned in heaven. He sits above us over all time, He was in heaven when King David petitioned Him and He has not been moved, nor will He be, by any power other than His own.
 

2.02.2005
  Cookies and Oxygen


We took our kids to the nursing home for the first time last night. We brought cookies for the residents (two of the residents that took them were diabetic and had to give them back). The kids were excellent! The people there get so excited to see children. One sweet lady told me that bringing children was like getting a shot of adrenaline in the arm). It is really a depressing place to be, but their little personalities can light up a room. Our daughter especially enjoyed herself, since within the first five minutes she had been given candy and a pink baby bear, plus both the children got to eat chocolate cookies the entire time they were there.

A few of the old ladies actually said they wished they had had more children (probably hoping one of them would have actually taken care of them), and one lady we met was from a family of sixteen!

We interrupted one group of ladies playing cards to distribute some cookies. As we were leaving we heard one of the ladies say "That was my grandchildren", another replied "they was yours?", "Yes, they came to visit me."
 

2.01.2005
  Sweetness to the soul


Conversation between my two-year old daughter and my wife:

L: "Mommy"

Wife: "Yes"

L: "I was talking to Jesus"

Wife: "You were, what did you say"

L: "Our Father, who art in Heaven"

 

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Name: ctroutma
Location: Tampa, FL

I am married to a fruitful vine and am father to two sons and two beautiful daughters.



Personalized Burp Cloths, Baby Blankets, Onesies and Nursery Decor at www.lilyputlane.com

Reading

from August 08
On the Beach, Nevil Shute
Dharma Bums, Jack Kerouac
Big Sur, Jack Kerouac
Visions of Cody, Jack Kerouac
Anthem, Ayn Rand
The Inferno, Dante

Articles, Etc.

Book List

My LibraryThing

Essay on False Community

The History of a Church, Part I

Conversations with Nathan


Tiller of the backyard garden


My Thoughts on Prayer
Our Father which art in Heaven
Hallowed be thy name
Thy kingdom come
Thy will be done
On earth as it is in Heaven
Give us this day our daily bread
And forgive us our debts

Links

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